![]() ![]() Because of this, a sense of alienation from the family can develop. ![]() Feelings of alienation: With oldest siblings getting the spotlight for their achievements, and the younger siblings getting attention because of their youth, middle children can feel that they don’t belong.Thus, middle children have more time to follow their own lead, without being noticed by parents. For instance, older children push boundaries that require parents to interfere, and younger children need more care and attention. High sense of independence: Middle children often get lost in the shuffle.Here are 10 common characteristics of middle children: However, their relaxed nature may also give them strong negotiating skills, among others. In some cases, though, they may feel lost within the family. This allows them a bit more freedom to be themselves. 3 They don’t have to lead the pack, and they don’t get the “babying” that their younger siblings do. 10 Characteristics of Middle ChildrenĬompared to their siblings, middle children may be much more agreeable and easygoing in life. This contributes to the sense of separateness that is a hallmark of middle child syndrome. This may contribute to middle children feeling compelled to behave and be seen as different from their older and younger siblings. It’s also been suggested that siblings work hard to distinguish themselves from one another, something Adler called de-identification. 2 Adler believed that a child’s position in the family constellation– a term that describes the relative position of each family member–dictated how that child was treated and how they developed. If you ask a middle child if the syndrome is real, most likely you will get a resounding “yes.” This concept has been around for over a century, ever since psychologist Alfred Adler shared his observations about the role of birth order on personality traits and interpersonal behavior. Being aware of their place within a family may greatly impact some children and shape the way they engage in relationships throughout their lives. They may feel neglected by others and obliged to maintain a peacekeeper’s role between their siblings. Middle children, though, are doomed to be stuck in the middle, and have to work harder to be the center of their parents’ attention. The youngest children also get to be “only children” once all of their siblings have moved out. Firstborns get the luxury of being the “ only child” for at least the better part of a year the youngest child often receives special attention from parents and siblings due to their role as the “baby” in the family lineup. Regardless of birth order, our experiences as children will be different from those of our siblings. 1 We learn a lot about relationships during our earliest years, and our relationships with siblings and parents can set the stage for all later relationships from childhood well into adulthood. However, while the number of “middle children” is shrinking–as fewer babies are being born than in prior decades–this hasn’t diminished the belief that “middle child syndrome” is a real issue for those who experience it. Although the term syndrome suggests that there is a medical or psychological diagnosis of middle child syndrome, it is not an actual disorder nor is there a single, accepted clinical definition for it. ![]()
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